Marriage is like a crystal vase, because both husband and wife must do their best if they don`t want their family be torn apart. However, all the shatters can be fixed and glued. Even if divorce is knocking at your door, don`t be desperate and make sure that you have done all the things in order to save the marriage.
What do people get used to do?
It is a common fact that if family has some problems they must address to psychotherapist. Hopeless clients must not overestimate their impact. Psychologist`s role is to push spouses to talk about issues they hide inside. They can provide you with advice, but it`s only up to you to follow therapist`s recommendation or not. What about fixing shatter of broken marriage with own hands of spouses? The solution is on the surface.
First rule of the fight club
Different people take marriage for granted. Marriage is an eternal struggle and every couple faces unpredictable issues that they must fight. According to that, the first rule of saving marriage – don`t tell anyone that it is in danger. Literally, the problem exists only between you and your partner, no one must be aware of your private life issues. The more you talk about marriage issues with other people the shorter your family life will last. Your beloved must learn about any problems the first, not your mum, a friend or a colleague. Sincere conversation is better that your own, in most occasions, fake predictions and false fantasies. So simply start to talk if you have noticed anything suspicious that can harm your marriage. It is impossible to solve the problem without defining it.
Find the reason
Every problem has a reason. If you are irritated when your spouse smokes, ask, what pushes him to do it, maybe he/she needs your support. Don`t be self-centered because your behaviour might be unsatisfactory too. Discuss the situations where issues that present damage for marriage take their roots. The origin of roots is a key to content of fruits. The deeper you go in the search of reasons, the more success results you are about to get.
Today people don`t treat the massive number of psychologists seriously. However, they’ve got special talent in understanding of the structure of relationships. There is no talent without hard work and professional competence. Psychotherapists know a thing or two in human behaviour, temperaments and periodicity of the crisis in marriages. The basic knowledge about personality of people can raise the curtain above reasons why your marriage crashes. It will be good if you do some tests to define the psychic type of your and spouse’s personality, which is a deep forest of unknown.
Start from yourself
Keep the enthusiasm to save marriage till the very success. Leave secondary things until tomorrow, ask for dissertation writing help if your head is stuck with studying issues. And be ready to change yourself. In any misfortunes that happen in your life you must not blame your partner. You are the only responsible person for actions and deeds. Taking care of yourself is not work of some other person, it is firstly your duty. If you fix your inner world you you will be able to help the beloved and save your marriage. Do more things that bring you happiness. Why have you stopped going for sports or playing musical instruments after the wedding? Do want you like and encourage partner too. Next, try to smile as often as possible. Turn it to a habit. Learn how to relax and teach your mate. Remember that your persistence will be highly awarded.
The cure of the wounds is hidden in forgiveness and trust. You cannot demand understanding from your partner if you don’t do it in turn. Show a good example of how a perfect spouse must behave. Try together to memorize the beginning of your relationship, find what improves your connection. Do you have a common favorite movie? Watch it during delicious dinner. Do your couple have any plans? Do your best in turning them into reality. Try to variegate marriage life with as much ways as possible.
If you really want to maintain the positive state of your marriage never stop developing. Read books and articles, visit seminars, listen to stories of from other couples. Wise person studies on mistakes of the other`s and does not accept to make her own. Everybody has a chance to master the wisdom of marriage.